Never Wanted To Dance
by Kodaa
Summary: Partial Songfic;  Never Wanted To Dance- Mindless Self Indulgence  Drabble-Snape recalls Lilly as he returns to her murderer, again and again.


_There is nothing you can do that I have not already done to myself..._

Severus Snape kept his eyes level and his expression cool as he looked directly into the face of the Dark Lord, his mouth moving without really consulting his mind first, "Of course I'm back, My Lord..." his lip curled up ever so slightly as he bowed, "I am yours, My Lord." It was so much easier without thinking. It was so much simpler without thinking. It was so much better without thinking. "Always."

_...There is nothing you can do that I have not already done to myself... _

Voldemort tilted his head, his eyes gentle in their icy, serpent-like manner, his voice soft as a lion's mane, "I always liked that about you, Severus..." A light, casual smile touched the corners of the deformed man's mouth as he glided forward, "Always looking me in the eyes...no matter what you've done wrong." He lifted a too-pale, frighteningly slender hand to Snape's cheekbone, letting it linger on the aged skin, "It's almost as though you see yourself...on my level, Severus? Are you fit to be my...most reliable, true servant?" The snake-like man's eyes never wavered from his own as he spoke.

_...There is nothing you can do that I have not already done to myself..._

Snape's eyes never changed, his face carefully composed. "Never, My Lord." He replied evenly, not looking down at Voldemort's wand-ignoring the way the Dark Lord stroked it, as he always did when he was itching to use it, "I am less than a mere muggle in comparison to you, My Lord." He bowed once more, unblinking. Not thinking about how that same wand his master held had been used to kill Lilly Potter, all those years ago. Not thinking about how it would be used on Harry Potter-the only living piece of his always-any day now.

_...There is nothing you can do that I have not already done to myself._

Snape was still emotionless, unblinking, and uncaring as Voldemort nodded sympathetically, removing his icy hand from his cheek, and quipping about repayment. Something about thirteen years of repayment, before the world went black and the word, "Crucio." resounded in Snape's head before the world went black.

_Never wanted to dance with nobody but you-_

And-there she was, amidst all of the pain within Snape's mind, a surprising wallflower at the last Yule Ball they would see for years.

Lilly. His Always. His Forever.

He barely heard himself, the voice of his younger self, seething, "The arrogant fool." And his vision was suddenly on a familiar, pompous, disgusting face he'd recognize for eternity. James Potter, on the dance floor, dancing with Sirius Black as the both smirked and sniggered, switching positions and gender-roles constantly throughout their dance. And there was Lilly again, tearful, seated alone. Left by Potter for Black. Again. He saw his thin, bony hand extend to Lilly, "Would you like to dance, my lady?"

"Sev..." The tearful girl sniffled out his name, and Snape's heart leaped. He saw his Always and Forever smile at him through her tears, tenderly taking his hand and allowing him to guide her to the floor.

_-Never wanted to dance with nobody but you-_

Her face flickered through his life, his voice resounding all around him as her faces changed.

"Lilly, I'm in love with you." Lilly looking tearful. _Don't say that, Sev, don't. Not with James here..._

"Lilly, I love you." Lilly, smiling slightly. _I know, Sevvy. 'Love you too-you're a brother to me. That means so much more than just a boyfriend, you know._

"Lils, you're everything to me." Lilly, with her face in her hands, laughing. _You never...you never give up, huh, Severus?_

"Always, Lilly." Lilly: grinning, hugging him. _I knew I could count on you, Sev!_

"As always." Lilly: looking shocked. _You...you really, came, Sevvy?_

"Always." Lilly: crying, but trying to hide her face. _Why do you always come back, Sev?_

"Always." Lilly: laughing aloud. _Really, Sev? You're so lame!_

"Always." Lilly:...half-smiling, half-crying. _Sev...don't...say that, Sev, don't do this to me, please._

"Lilly...no, I-" Lilly, sobbing. _I love you, too, Sev...I'm so sorry...I can't talk to you anymore. Bye, Sev..._

"I'm sorry, Lilly, no, I'm so sorry-"-Lilly, no, Lilly, no please...

...

Lilly...

**...Lost in thought, Severus?**

_-Never wanted to dace with nobody, but you __**wouldn't take no for an answer, you fucking bitch.**_

Voldemort's voice was like a shock of cold water, unwelcome in his memories of Lilly. Unwelcome in the last thing Snape held dear, bringing him back to the excruciating pain at hand.

Was there nothing sacred anymore?

Snape could only form a single thought. A single notion that kept him sane.

Voldemort would pay dearly.

Soon.

* * *

><p>Derp. :P<p> 


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